Offer Accepted ...

Soon after my last post, I found an email, sent by my man in Kisii. I almost dared not read it.

After the usual profuse greeting to me and mine, he eventually got around to telling me that my offer had been accepted. As long as I could get the money out to Kisii before the end of the month, the business was mine.

He apologised for the delay in letting me know, but the power had been cut, which got me wondering why I was starting up a reasonably high-tech business in an area where electricity is still a luxury, and therefore not always available.

Oh well, at least the competition has the same problem - yes, there are other cyber cafés in town. In fact the shop next door is a bigger, "better" cyber café. But mine still has its fair share of clients.

And I reckon, at very little cost (and a UK mind-set), we could make ours as attractive as next door. Not that we need to increase our client base by much. We only have 10 PCs and most are occupied for a good part of the day.

All I need to do now is save up my air fare (and some spending money) and get out there!

Another Step Towards Kenya

At 4,500 miles, it would take a while to walk to Kenya. So I have embarked upon another means of getting there and surviving financially when I get there.
My man in Kisii works part-time as the IT engineer for a cyber café in the town. It is not the biggest, or the smartest, or the most used, but it plods along, making a profit.

The owner is having to move to the City due to his work and needed a quick sale. My man heard about this and immediately contacted me.

I started hunting around, collecting pennies from down the back of the sofa, the car centre console, etc. but couldn't quite make the asking price. So I had to go to plan 2 and beg.

The result was that yesterday, I could tell my man in Kisii to make an offer.

I am now sitting here in a very wet UK (the rain is chucking it down with high winds as I type) waiting to be told whether my offer has been accepted.

This is a big step. I would trust my man in Kisii with my life, so having him run a business in my absence isn't an issue.

It is just the act of investing abroad. I have done it before and ended up with a very bloody nose. It is also a step towards setting up my nest in Kenya. I know that once I am settled, there will be no return because of the artificial currrency exchange rate.

The business is small. But it has a lot of potential to grow with a bit of imagination and hard work, and my man in Kisii is not afraid of hard work - he is a Kenyan after all!

Need to lose a few pounds? Go to Kenya!

Inspired by Mzungu Chick's latest blog, I thought I would share my weight loss programme with you.

To start, you need to have the car you use in Kenya to be torched during a riot, ensuring that there is no money in the kitty to replace it (this latter is extremely easy!).

Then visit upcountry - I chose Kisii - and live like a Kenyan on the breadline. This involves eating the staple food, sukuma wiki and ugali, and because you can afford it, fresh fruit by the kilo, every day for a month.

To get to town, about 1 mile away, you walk - uphill, bearing in mind that Kisii is at an elevation of 5,577 ft to start with. Do not take the matatu until you have walked at least ½ mile and have broken out in an uncontrolable sweat - the wheazing whilst breathing is optional.

Do all this with a 35litre back pack containing an old (and heavy) laptop, digital camera and all the other bits and pieces necessary to play the part of a tourist.

Once in town, bob from cyber cafe to cyber cafe until you find a queue that does not comprise half the population of the town. This is usually on the 3rd or 4th floor of a mall with no lift.

Upon leaving the cyber cafe, walk around town with a young person who is used to the thin atmosphere and can walk at 6 mph.

Walk home, stopping at the local supermarket. Buy sweets for 36 kids. Arrive home. Collapse.

Repeat every weekday.

On Saturdays, spend time teaching kids to play volleyball, skipping, skittles, hula hoop, tennis, etc., all this accompanied by a four-year-old who considers that he has been put on this Earth only to sit on your shoulders - permanently (at this point, the rucksack can be dispensed with).

Sundays - rest, comprising amusing previously mentioned four-year-old, making paper aeroplanes, skittles, playing football (you are the only person allowed to even touch the new ball you bought him!)!

I can guarantee that you will lose weight - a lot of weight!

What's It For?

As I sit here, writing my blog entry, I wonder "Why?"

Why am I doing this? Is anyone actually reading this?

Of course, no blogger knows whether their work is being read unless they get comments from the readers. I have had a couple, but they are few and far between.

So, am I wasting my time writing this?

Then another question pops up. Does it really matter? Why did I start writing a blog? Why does anyone?

In my case, it was to put down "on paper" my frustrations and fears over Kenya and my desire to return to the country of my choice. In which case, does it matter whether any one else reads it?

No. I think I am writing this to let off steam, to put my thoughts down wher I can see them and maybe make a decision, or at least see a problem more clearly.

So then, why not a diary, written in Word or similar? Or even, a real diary, you know, pen into exercise book?

OK, the last comment is ridiculous. I am left-handed and get cramp in my poor old hand after writing two lines. Then it becomes unreadable, not tht it would be a problem as no one would read it anyway.

Is there a little vanity in bloggers? Do they hope that someone will read their blog and maybe even award one of those little badges that so many seem to be passing around to one another? Maybe.

Do I really care if no one reads my blog? Probably.

Would I be happy if someone awarded me a "Good Blogger" badge? Definitely, but at the same time, seeing the quality of other bloggers, I would be surprised.

Oh well ...

Contact Lost

It is a few days now since I have had any contact with antone in Kenya. This is unusual. I usually have contact with Vincent in Kisii at least three times a week. I usually get an email from Nairobi, and Mzungu Chick usually posts something in her blog.

But, nothing!

I know it has been raining hard in Nyanza Province, and that may have kept Vincent at home (he has to go to a cyber café to contact me). Then again, I heard a rumour that the cyber café that he works in is closing down - no more free Internet!

So I really don't know what is going on in Kenya, at grass roots level, at the moment. Still, no news is good news - isn't it?

Christian Aid

Our Rector's wife came round this evening, collecting the Christian Aid envelopes. Unfortunately, our dog had eaten ours, and as she rummaged around in her bag for another one, I told her that I was disillusioned with them.

During the PEV (Post Election Violence) in Kenya, my organisation had the partial responsibility for nearly 3,000 displaced people who had fled the violence. I could do little from here (the UK) but contacted the Red Cross, Oxfam, Christain Aid, etc. to notify them of the plight of these people and to ask for help. I got a couple of replies, but no aid for these people.

The reason, we guess, was that our town is off the main Mombasa-Nairobi-Kisumu-Eldoret route, and were therefore a bit more difficult to get to.

But surely this is not the point.

Oh, what the heck, I've already blogged about this and I don't want to go through it again.

In the end, I put my loose change in the envelope. I am Christian, after all. And they are only human.

Fallen off the Radar

On the face of it, it should be a good sign, Kenya not being in the news for a while. Due to the Burmese crisis, the China earthquake, the Zimbabwe (non?) election, there is little if anything relating to Kenya on any of the International news websites.

But thre is a lot going on in Kenya. Food is short and prices are rocketing. Fertiliser and seed prices are also up. The Government is forcing people presently in IDP camps back to their homes, regardless of the risk of violence erupting and dissent bolstering the Mungiki.

The new coalition government is knee-jerking and any measures taken about just about anything seems to be short-sighted.

Is Kenya ever going to get back to the relative stability it enjoyed before the Presidential election debacle?

Grass

As I was mindlessly wandering up and down the lawn, being pulled along by the mower, I was dreaming of kenya - Kisii to be geographically precise.

Here I am, mowing a lawn that stretches to about ¼acre. What a waste of time and space. In Kenya, this land would be put to good use, growing crops to feed the family.

My friend in Kisii could not believe we have so much non-productive land.

He has a strip of grass running along the house, but the rest of his land, as well as a plot he bought, was all freshly tilled ready for planting.

So here I was, mowing this lawn, wondering how much food I could grow if I turned the land over to vegetables.

What makes this worse, is that attached to the property, we have a paddock of about 1 acre. Now that, in Kenya would almost be a self-sufficient farm and my paddock is just brambles, weeds and ragwort!

How Lucky We Are ...

We just don't realise, do we? We take so much for granted.

You are thirsty? Have a drink of water ... from the tap or a beer from the fridge.

Cold? Switch the electric fire or central heating on.

Need to go somewhere? Jump in the car, or at worst, on a bus, running to a regular timetable.

So what is this rant leading to?

Stuck as I am in the UK, with many friends and business associates in Kenya, any communication is usually over the internet, email, Skype, MSN Messenger, etc. This of course relies on the power not being cut and the telphone lines working.

But, from time to time, I have to send things by post. Remeber the post? Writing the address on an envelope, sticking a stamp on it and putting it in a letter box?

Then, if it is going abroad, filling in a Customs label, trying to make the contents as uninteresting as possible, so that it does not atract Import Duty, and more importantly, catch the eye of some postal worker who is looking for something to acquire.

Well, in this last, I seem to be sadly lacking.

I have recently sent a parcel containing some small computer accessories to a friend in Kenya. It didn't arrive.

I have sent some official forms to Nairobi and they haven't arrived either.

It just doesn't happen over here. If we post something, it arrives.

This is assuming that the mail gets lost over there, rather than over here, of course. But I think this is a safe assumption.

Living Conditions

I have been meaning to write this for a long time, but life has grabbed me by the throat and kept me in the real world - that is the world of having to work, rather than writing blogs.

While I was in Kenya in March, I lived with Kenyans, ordinary Kenyans, in their homes.

So, where to start? I suppose, with my living conditions in the South of England.

I live in a large bungalow in a small village. Our property backs onto the lands of an ancestral home, so it is calm.

The bungalow has the usual central heating, lighting, telephone line, fitted kitchen, bathroom, shower room, three bedrooms and two living rooms, two TVs - it is a "normal", middle class abode. I have a car, not new, but reliable. I have two computers and a laptop, all permanently connected to broadband.

-oOo-

My first stop in Kenya was Kisii, where I stayed for 10 days with friends, Vincent and Abigael. They live in a rented two-bedroomed bungalow comprising a sitting room, kitchen, wet room and the two bedrooms.

There is no electricity or running water and the toilet is a deep-pit latrine 20 or 30 yards from the house.

Most of the garden is for growing food and Vincent has also bought a second plot adjacent, to grow more.

I felt rather guilty as, being a guest, I had been given the "good" bedroom. I shared it with one of the kids, Josephat. Everyone else slept in the other bedroom. This suited Jojo, as he never strayed more than about 3 feet from me the whole time I was there. He has decided that I am his Baba Mzungu (white Dad).

Lighting is by kerosene lamp in the main room and by torch or candle anywhere else.
The kitchen is a room with a couple of low work surfaces, no running water and no cooker. Cooking is over kerosene or charcoal.

Water is brought up from the river every day by a water carrier and has to be boiled.

Internet connection is out of the question, so collecting emails, etc., involves a trip into town to visit one of the many cyber cafés.

The wet room is just a room with a small hole in the wall to let out water. Having a wash involves heating water in the kitchen and carrying it into the wet room in a bowl.

Despite being a "soft" European, I survived. No - more than that. I actually enjoyed my stay there. I happily put up with what I saw as deprivation. OK, going to the loo during a downpour was a bit of a pain, but hey! This is Kenya!

-oOo-

The second leg of my stay was far more "civilised". I had arranged to use an apartment in the village on the coast, sharing it with my girlfriend and her two children.

This apartment comprises a massive living room with dining area, a kitchen with a combi cooker (two gas rings, two electric), although the electric part is not connected, and a fridge/freezer, a bathroom with a bath with shower, "real" toilet, basin and running water (only cold). The bedroom has a king-size and large single bed.

There is electricity, although only one power point in each room. There is also a TV in the living room. The whole is finished off with a large, east-facing balcony.

Few of the windows are glazed. It is not necessary, the temperature never falls below 20C. They are all covered with mosquito-proof netting.

This leg of my stay in Kenya was luxury - a real shower, a real toilet, a real kitchen. And then, of course, I was with my girlfriend!

-oOo-

The third leg was in a suburb of Nairobi. My friend there has a four-bedroom terraced house with a front and back yard. It is in a gated estate with security guard.

The house comprises two floors. Upstairs, there are two bedrooms and a bathroom, the ground floor has the living room, kitchen, wet room, a guest bedroom and with access from the front yard there is the fourth bedroom. Normally this might have been the domestic quarters, or workroom.

The kitchen is basic, but does have electricity and running water, although it is not advisable to drink it.

The wet room has an "Asian" toilet which flushes, a basin and a shower head, again giving only cold water.

Cooking is over kerosene or charcoal, but every room has electric light, as long as the supply is working!

This was very comfortable, and I could happily live in this house, but it was not as "comfortable" as the apartment on the coast. Nor would I particularly want to live close to Nairobi.

Given the choice of the three places I know, I would settle in Kisii - the coast is just too hot.

This stay in Kenya, particularly Kisii, reminded me of just how lucky I am, living where I do.

But even the house in Kisii would be considered luxury to many Kenyans, who live in small traditional mud huts under thatch, not through choice, but because they can afford nothing better.

Is No News Good News?

Through the wonderful medium of Skype, I usually have some contact with Vincent in Kisii (he is the director of the children's home), but I haven't heard anything from him for since about Sunday - it now being Thursday. The last time this happened, he had been down with malaria.

I believe the kids are still off school, so of course, there is more to do at home (Jojo and Benta are living with Vincent and Abigael), and also the other kids on the register will be floating around.

But, Vincent is my "link" with Kenya. Without it I go cold turkey. I like to get news of what is happening, especially as Kisii is so different to Nairobi. It is a provincial town with its own economy.

I also get news of the children, and sometime, even some funny stories, or photos.

So, without my almost daily contact, I start to worry. Is everyone OK? What is the food situation? Is one of the kids ill or injured? Or maybe Vincent or Abigael?

I know that even the smallest of our children is far more robust than the average European. They don't have our soft lives. Kids of 9 or 10 can wield a machete to cut wood without cutting both their legs off. But it is worrying to see them using such a dangerous tool.

Oh well, I dare say that everything is fine, Vincent is either tied up with work, or the kids, or both and he will get into town to the cyber-café when he can.

In the meantime, I will sit here and worry.

Where is Zimbabwe going?

It has been announced, albeit unofficially, that Morgan Tsvangirai has beaten Uncle Bob in the Presidential election. The country is gearing up for a run-off election between the two.

In the meantime, the army and "war veterans" are carrying out a campaign of terror against the supporters of the MDC.

So, let's just assume that after the run-off, Morgan wins outright. Then what?

The army seems to be loyal to Uncle Bob; the war veterans certainly are. So what will the new MDC Government do? How will they bring Zimbabwe back into some sense of normality? Will Tsvangirai and his new government be allowed to rule, or will there be a coup?

Winning an election in a country where violence and repression has been the order of the day for so long, may not count for much.

A Lesson in How To ...

... Run the Country's Finances.

From the BBC News Website (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/africa/7375140.stm)

Kenya cash shortfall over cabinet.

Kenya needs to find another $300m to pay for the expanded coalition cabinet formed after a power-sharing deal.

Finance Minister Amos Kimunya says he may be forced to shift funding from vital programmes like resettling the displaced to pay for new ministries.

Or from the Daily Nation website (http://www.nationmedia.com/dailynation/nmgcontententry.asp?category_id=1&newsid=122218)

Grand Cabinet to cost Sh33bn in two months

Taxpayers will pay Sh33 billion to fund the grand coalition Cabinet in the next two months alone.

Some of the money will be shifted from programmes with major social implications, including the building of new hospitals and road rehabilitation.

The programmes had been factored into the Budget for the current financial year which ends in June.

The high cost of managing the expanded Cabinet became clear in a mini-budget presented by Finance minister Amos Kimunya in Parliament Tuesday.

Kenyan politicians are among the world's best paid MPs - each taking home about $17,000 in salaries and allowances each month. To re-direct money that is destined to help the poorest in the country is disgusting!

More violence ... ?

It has been reported today on the BBC that Charles Ndungu, the leader of the political wing of the Mungiki, Kenya National Youth Alliance, has been shot dead in his car near to Naivasha.

A couple of weeks ago, the wife of the leader of the sect was murdered and this led to riots, bringing Nairobi to a standstill. These were only brought to a halt when Raila Odinga agreed to talks with the sect.

Can we look forward to more "reprisals" from this outlawed and lawless, mafia-style organisation? Or will it lead to another crack-down on the Mungiki by the police?

Either way, the only people who will benefit will be the undertakers.

Staggering from Crisis to Crisis

I have been taking a keen interest in Kenya for about four years now, and until recently, say Christmas last year, everything seemed to be calm. Kenya rarely figured on the news websites or in the UK newspapers.

But, since the Presidential election, Kenya is never out of the news, allegations of vote rigging, violence, political corruption, mass murder, inter-tribal violence, the Mount Kenya Mafia, police brutality,displaced people, assassinations, the Mungiki, food shortages, and now the prison warders strike - have I missed anything?

And all this has happened in the last four months! What is happening to this wonderful country? How can so few people (the legislators) cause so much havoc in such a short time?

Will Kenya ever get back to the peaceful haven that it was before the elections, or will the underlying racial tensions continue to dominate the lives of the wananchi?

As far as I can make out, Kenyans were so proud of their mixed culture, with 42 tribes, Arabs Indians, and Europeans, all living in harmony, and on my first visit in September 2007, I was impressed.

Now, after my second visit in March of this year, although I did not see any violence, I did notice a tension, especially in the Rift Valley. Maybe I was imagining it, but as far as I was concerned, it was there.

Surprise, surprise

Kenya's parties 'bribed voters'

Kenya's political parties spent millions of dollars bribing voters in last year's elections, a survey says. OK, so is this really news, or did we already know this?

The Coalition for Accountable Party Finance says out of $90m raised by the parties, 40% was used as bribes.

The report also says public corporations contributed to President Mwai Kibaki’s campaign via his party.

The allegations relate to both of Kenya's main parties - the Orange Democratic Movement (ODM) and Mr Kibaki's Party of National Unity (PNU).

The lobby group now wants legislation to compel politicians to reveal their sources of income and expenditure during election campaigns.

Charles Otieno, who heads the Coalition for Accountable Party Finance, says new laws are needed urgently.

"Most of the money politicians use is from tax-payers and without such laws they will continue to spend massive amounts from the public coffers with impunity," Mr Otieno said.

The report alleged that the state-owned electricity company charged customers around $8m too much and then donated the surplus to a political party.

But the Kenya Power and Lighting Company (KPLC) denies the allegations.

"These accusations are completely untrue and the organisation should come up with evidence to prove their claims," KPLC’s chief executive Don Priestman said.

But Mr Otieno insists several government departments created inflated invoices and used the money for campaigning.

The report says the parties also raised funds from Kenyans in the diaspora and Kenyan companies based overseas.

The lobby group says candidates should declare their wealth before they contest an election, to prevent such abuses of power.

World Malaria Day

This is the first World Malaria Day and United Nations Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon is to launch a new campaign to eliminate deaths from malaria.

I wish him luck. I have been studying malaria, or more accurately, mosquito control. Studies have been made all over the world, some with really encouraging results, but from what I can see, because these studies are carried out by academics (naturally), once the result has been found, that's the end of it. No one actually puts the trials into long-term meaningful action.

So, let us hope that Ban Ki-moon can kick the powers that be into some sort of shape to do something about this disease and the unnecessary deaths it causes.

The Kenyan government, a long time ago, started a programme of issuing insecticide treated nets to all under-fives, firstly at subsidised prices and more recently, for free. I raise my hat to them.

The problem is that the responsibility has been passed to NGOs, usually foreign. In my experience (admittedly limited), these NGOs are falling down on the job.

For example, my orphanage in Kisii has not received a single net although we have several children under five.

The director of the home has two children under five. He has not received any nets. And other people I talked to in the town with children under five have not received nets either.

The government is paying these NGOs to do a job. Where is the money going?

Baby Naming

So the names Kofi and Raila are suddenly very popular in Kenya, especially in the West of the country.

A record number of boys are being named after new Prime Minister Raila Odinga, and the former UN chief Kofi Annan who helped mediate an end to the violence.

Baby girls have been named after Graca Machel who also helped broker the recent power-sharing agreement.

US presidential hopefuls, Barack Obama, whose father was Kenyan, and Hillary Clinton, have also been popular.

Among the Luo and Luhya tribes in Kisumu, serious consideration goes into the choice of name, as it is believed the baby will adopt the traits of the person it has been named after.

Oh well, whatever rocks your cradle, I suppose.

Raila keeps his Promise

It is not often that it can be said of a politician that he has fulfilled a promise!

"We will ensure that power, wealth and opportunity are [in] the hands of many, not the few," he said after taking his oath of office.

Well Raila, you certainly have. With the inflated Cabinet, you have certainly made sure that wealth and opportunity is in the hands of many!

Back in the UK - again.

Back home, I have brought a lot of "tasks" with me. I have a list of people to contact over here. I have to make up a poster to say a big Thank You from the kids in Kisii to the people in my community for their help. And I have a bit of research to do, too.

The weather is appalling. Two days after my return, it snowed. Bearing in mind that in Nairobi the average daytime temperature is 26C, snow is most unwelcome.

The only good things I can think of to cheer myself up is that I have a fast broadband connection, a car and ... well, that's about it really.

On the downside, the government appears to be in self-destruct mode, fuel prices and the cost of living in general is on an upward spiral. Oh well, I suppose it is better than conditions in Kenya - for the wananchi anyway. There are still thousands of people displaced, unwilling to go back to their homes for fear of violence. There are thousands of children still separated from their families, still not knowing if indeed their families still exist.

Watching the news from Kenya, I am relieved to see that the two main players have agreed to agree and have formed a Government. But it looks so much like the law-makers are more interested in lining their own pockets, and getting comfortable. It appears that nothing is being done to help the displaced people, nothing is being done to avert a food shortage, in fact, as far as running the country is concerned, nothing is being done about anything! From the outside, it looks as if a terrorist organisation, the Mungiki are running the country!

And then, down the road, there is Uncle Bob in Zimbabwe, who seems to be copying Kenya's dash to the brink of civil war. The difference is that Kenya's Kibaki is not a bad man. He is not a despot. And when he saw that his country was about to fall apart around him, he did something about it.

Uncle Bob or Tim as he seems to be known by some (That Idiot Mugabe) is a despot. He is power-hungry. He cannot be holding on for the money. If, after 28 years of rule, he hasn't managed to divert enough money for his own use, he has left it a bit late.

Unlike Mugabe, I believe that Kibaki and Raila care about Kenya and the people. OK, so there is bickering about who should do what, who should get the plum jobs, cars, offices, etc. But they found a solution while Kenya still has a chance to rebuild itself.

Zimbabwe, on the other hand, is going to be difficult to rebuild. A large proportion of the population has left the country. 80% are unemployed. And the Government is spending money on arms instead of food for the starving.